Ok so Pres gave me a new job. Get more facebook friends. Becaemploy/utilize apparently ever since that contest ended when the primarily lady promised el pres a blowjob if we got enough facebook fans our page gets no new fans which is fucking stupid. Like how can you not be a fan of the best site on the internet except more than 2 million assholes are fans of gay ass shit love sour gummy worms and I hate when you burn your tongue and it feels weird for days. Give me a fucking rest and get your goddamn priorities in line. Here s the deal. Below I have included some of my ideas if we get enough facebook fans except I am completely open to your suggestions on what to do for certain milestones. Keep in mind that its going to receive a lot of fucking fans to do what most of you are going to suggest so you are going to have to beg yourself how bad do you intend to/tend to it. And then start inviting your friends to participate our page. For the record we have 27751 fans right now which is fucking weak. Leave your ideas in the comments section and if I love any of them we can arrange something.

But here are the starters that are official! (Click Here To Join The Fan Page)

1000 new fans- I ll go make pres a sandwich before I leave today since I belong in kitchen anyways.

10000 new fans- Kym and I will remake the Call on me video nonetheless way hotter.

25000 new fans- I ll receive a new stoolie facebook fan out on a romantic date that you have to pay for since pres doesn t pay for shit. As often no fucking unless you re super hot. Seriously though random pick of somebody on facebook no thing how creepy

1 million new fans- I ll make a killer lesbian porno with anyone you intend to/tend to.

900 billion new fans- I ll fuck Devlin the intern.

You get the idea&.Send me ideas at jenna@barstoolsports.com.

This is sensory overload on many levels.

Devlin: so youre saying theres a alternative?

why dont you take a picture spread eagle and anyone who becomes a fan on facebook gets access to it.

soooooo what does Devlin get out of this? Herpes?

anyway heres my suggestion:

8 new fans You star in a snuff film Ill directly it.

I wonder how long itll take Devlin to create 900 billion fake Facebook profiles.

And this marks June 18 2010 like the day when my life finally has a purpose

haha more good stuff from jenna nonetheless begging for facebook fans is fucking weak sauce pres.

i hope this girl has some level of self-respect&..what did EP do to convince you?

Major League style every 1000 fans a piece of the clothing comes off by my calculations it would take about 100000 fans for topless and 500000 for the full monty and 1 million fans for the lesbianos video.

I think for starters you got to get rid of the gayass profile pic. That alone is going to lose fans.

You can try to remake that video hotter nevertheless unless you do it naked I distrust it. And Kym kind of looks like a dude.